Tuesday, October 21, 2014

My feelings towards doctors and waiting rooms.

I do not like waiting rooms at doctors offices. They always smell like baby poop and old lady stench. Literally, I'm suffocating right now. There are at least 12 other people/children in this tiny ass room and there is only ONE DOCTOR in this office. I might as well set up a tent and get ready to camp the fuck out. I'm praying they have free wifi.... Ok I just checked. I'm currently connected to a printer's wifi. Fuck yea dood.
But like really though. Idk if I'm gonna survive the putrid stench of this waiting room. My nose holes are burning so badly right now. Oh, and did I mention it's cold in here? Yea. Its cold in here. I'm thinking warm thoughts and it's not making me feel warm. I wish I had a blanket and some snacks, cuz I'm also hungry.. Random, but like, here I am sitting in this god awful stankass room, freezing to death, and literally the first food item that comes to mind is a fucking banana split. Like, really brain? Really? A cold dessert? You can do better than that... Chicken noodle soup. Hot wings. Mashed potatoes and gravy. Chili and corn bread. Even a cheeseburger. Those are much more appropriate..
And now, my bladder is informing me that I need to tinkle. This is great. Just fucking spectacular. I am not pleased with today. Can I just go home? Depending on what the doctor says, I might just do that. Go home, eat a sammich, take a nap, maybe do some laundry (probably not tho) because the idea of going back to work makes me wanna cry a little... I keep thinking about all the work that's piled up on my desk right now and I just wanna crawl in a hole and hide forever.
So. Anyways. My appointment is/was scheduled for 11:30, the current time: 11:51, I got here at 11:20. I am still in the waiting room. This is the worst. Like, psh. What's even the point of scheduling an appointment? They never get you in a room til a lot of minutes after your scheduled "appointment time" and then you wait even longer in the room for the doctor to show up and poke you for a couple of minutes then thats it. It's over. You're basically done. Like, why? Why?
Whatever. I just want some allergy and cough medicine so I can feel like a human again. Because, coughing all day and all night isn't fun. And not being able to breathe is totes NOT the bomb dot com. Not only are my nose holes blocked, but my ear holes are blocked as well. Every now and then I'll yawn or something and BOOM, suddenly one ear pops and I can hear again. It's almost magical being able to hear the world again..
Current time: 12:04
Current status: sitting in a temporary room until a real room opens up.
And now I'm waiting patiently to use the potty because I'm literally about to pee my pants. I wish I was joking. I drink a lot of water daily, so when I get the urge to pee, I better find a pisser real fuckin fast.
This really sucks a lot, but I should probably end this ranting blog post now.
Until later, my minions. XOXO

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